“Ohana means family…and family means nobody gets left behind…or forgotten…”

Everyone deserve a family…an “ohana”…no one is perfect…no one ever will be.

It’s so easy to say you love someone, but so hard to prove just how unconditional love is! At the lack of a transactional exchange we are able to discard that love and pretend that it never existed.

I suppose this is a letter to him, a letter to any of the narcs, sociopaths, dids etc who have been abandoned because of the damage and destruction caused…and some just because they are different. Not every person allows their disorder to turn them into abusive and damaging people, they work every single day to be better and different and so often…they do.

It is unfair to umbrella every single person under one blanket assumption that they are just unsafe…the truth is…we all are. In our own ways when our safety is threatened we turn into the very things we were fighting against…I know I certainly have.

To my ex…you will ALWAYS be my ohana, and I will never leave you behind in whatever way I can. Just because we cannot be together does not mean that I stopped loving you or forgot you or tried to replace you. Love doesn’t mean being together, it doesn’t alway even mean liking or trusting the person…it means unconditionally and unequivocally…you are loved and you always have a home even if you aren’t there.

Being able to remove oneself from what it means to love and be loved in return is difficult…I’ve fought for so long to tell myself how much I can’t stand him, but the truth is that I know him, and while every single thing that happened can never be forgiven and it will never stop hurting, the damage is irreparable…he is still somewhere in there, past his actions, beyond his horrible words…deep down behind the pain and trauma … is a man trapped in a world he cannot escape…and that man is loved.

He is not his actions, his diagnosis or his decisions…

On a physical level … I am not safe…and I am better now than I was with him…on an emotional one, I loved him and will continue to with all his demons that suffocate him as much as they tried to suffocate me!! He is safer without someone who gets past his prison walls…I scratched the wall…it was no longer safe…and I understand that now…but my heart still belongs to him.

Lilo and Stitch is such a deep animation…Lilo loves Stitch and is willing to risk her safety in order to push past his hurt ..I never realized up until now just how insanely apt it is in relation to my relationship.

He was my Stitch…and every 626 deserves love…real love…not ownership and manipulation…Raw and real love.

No one wants to be the bad guy…but no one wants to acknowledge that we all become the villain at some point and we need to fix it…

I wish Stitch would come back home…to me…but I also know that Stitch would wreck what was left of home, and maybe it’s better this way…to love him from a safe distance…but to still love him.

Ohana means family…and family means no one gets left behind…or…